Forum Topic

Brian Bilston has something important to say; listen up folks!

HOW MUCH I DISLIKE THE DAILY MAILI would rathereat Quavers that are six week’s stale,blow dry the hair of Gareth Bale,listen to the songs of Jimmy Nail,than read one page of the Daily Mail.If I were boredin a waiting room in Perivale,on a twelve hour trip on British railor a world circumnavigational sail,I would not read the Daily Mail.I would happily readthe complete works of Peter Mayle,the autobiography of Dan Quayle,selected scripts from Emmerdale,but I couldn’t ever read the Daily Mail.Far better tostand outside in a storm of hail,be blown out to sea in a powerful galethen swallowed by a humpback whalethan have to read the Daily Mail.Even ifI were blindand it was the only thingin Braille,I still would not readthe Daily Mail.

Gerry Boyce ● 14d51 Comments

Glad you like it. He's quite a wordsmith.

Gerry Boyce ● 18h

that's great :)

Michael Brigo ● 19h

Here's a poem by Brian Bliston I am sure you will all find relevant, pertinent, enjoyable and above all else amusing!TODAY’S CLIMATE FORECASTAnd onto today’s climate forecast, where we can expect to see a prolonged spell of inaction,interspersed with patches of hazy promisesacross many areas. Over Westminster and other centres of government,a build-up of hot air will cause inactivity to soarto record levels over the coming days,in spite of the high pressure.Elsewhere, a front of chronic misinformation will sweep in from the east,  bringing with it a thick band of climate change deniersand the chance of scattered falsehoods,while powerful gusts of idiocy and ignorancelook set to blow across social media.Outbreaks of ‘We just got on with it in 1976’and ‘It’s called the British summer, mate’ are likely.

Gerry Boyce ● 21h

But, Andy, it's how you throw the paint :-) Actually, I don't think London's National Gallery has much modern art; if you're after some Jackson Pollock paintings best go to the National Gallery, Washington, DC, or the Tate Modern?

Michael Ixer ● 13d

MichaelI'm not talking about masterpieces. More the ones that look like a child has thrown paint at the surface.But I'm sure you new that

Andy Pike ● 13d

Each morning I wake to a brand new day stretch my arms and yawn in dismay. Off to the bathroom all full of heart, saying here is another day ready to start.  Sitting down for my first cup of tea, saying this is the last cigarette for me, knowing I've said this all in jest and can't get this catarrh of my chest. Tomorrow I say I will start a new 1 cigarette not 2.  I'm awaiting your made up poems. Alter mine if you like.

Barbara Stevens ● 13d

hmmm...think you'll have to do better, Andy, then a snide below the belt low energy jab.Still Team Babs for me.

Gerry Boyce ● 13d

Andy, that seems an odd and, to me, a not very patriotic, statement to make about the UK's national art collection which has an excellent variety of paintings. A sample from the recently revamped Salisbury Wing:https://flic.kr/p/2roVhwGhttps://flic.kr/p/2roR6tZhttps://flic.kr/p/2roXgTHhttps://flic.kr/p/2roXibHhttps://flic.kr/p/2roXn92https://flic.kr/p/2roWEgUhttps://flic.kr/p/2roeskr

Michael Ixer ● 13d

But there again a broken clocks right twice a day

Andy Pike ● 13d

Not down at all she is absolutely correct !!

Andy Pike ● 13d

Ha Ha! I'm definitely Team Babs on this one!G'wan Barbara give him another dig while he's down!

Gerry Boyce ● 13d

Score 1 to Ms Stevens there!

David Ainsworth ● 13d

Same as your typing Andy.

Barbara Stevens ● 13d

Cost of loving is life some of those paintings in the national gallery, could gVe been done by a child.

Andy Pike ● 13d

Mr Boyce, you are obviously easily amused.

Sue Hammond ● 14d

I wonder how many men are like that, as for the bath time, years ago people did only bath 1 week, probably on a Sunday.

Barbara Stevens ● 14d

Interesting that the supposed literary critics here seem more upset with his political views (and hus having the absolute nerve to criticise the Daily Mail!) than with the poetry itself....

Richard Carter ● 14d

'Studied Scottish poetry. Got third degree Burns."Ho, Ho and thrice times Ho!

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

Cheers, Martine.Here's one you might enjoy, and relate to, as prices continue to rocket up:The Cost of Loving.I love you more than life itselfbut I swear I’ll love you betterif you let me turn the heating offand you wear another sweater.I cannot get enough of you –I’m completely in your thrall,when I see you bending overto unplug the telly at the wall.Yes, you’re the only one for me,my sweet and fragrant flower(if you can ditch the daily bathsfor one weekly 4-min shower).Make no mistake, I love you loads,you send my head into a spin –which reminds me … eco-wash on thirty,cram as much as you can in.My cup of love is full for you –it overflows, my petal.So make yourself a brew with me,just don’t overfill the kettle.

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

I thought Refugees is quite clever if one reads it backwards ... And whether you're a refugee or King of England would seem to be an accident of birth?

Michael Ixer ● 14d

Gerry, thanks for this reply.  Yes I will notice him now because of your post on PutneySW15. re: Solihull, it is its own Borough and part of the West Midlands, but not part of Birmingham. 

Martine Guy ● 14d

Ha, ha. A better LinkedIn profile than most of the technical CISOs, GDPR, IT, management consultants, etc :-)

Michael Ixer ● 14d

The two poems reprinted on this thread suggest that Mr Bilston has nothing important to say. The first expresses nothing more than dislike of the 'Mail'. Revealingly he doesn't give any reason for his contempt of the paper because, like many people on the left, he assumes all right thinking people think the same as him, making explanation unnecessary. The second poem is a heavy handed character assassination of the majority of the population (including the Prime Minister and most of the Labour Front Bench) who believe that unrestricted immigration to this country  is a threat to the the economy  and to social cohesion. As to Mr Bilston' s vaunted literary skills, the first poem demonstrates a witty use of rhyme but the second is simply doggerel.

Steven Rose ● 14d

https://uk.linkedin.com/in/brian-bilston-634165120

Philippa Bond ● 14d

Well certainly not many Daily Mail readers anyway!

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

Hi Martine, the heading is mine, I wrote it to deliberately attract attention, and obviously, it worked. If I had written; 'Here's a poem about a subject many of you will disagree with by a poet many of you will never have heard of', it wouldn't have had the same effect.Now you know something about him, check him out, he's very good and very entertaining.By the way, my family lived in Solihull in the sixties, they always said it was in Birmingham; where do you say it is?

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

He's quite well known in literary and arts circles. I've often seen his works reposted by FB friends who have those backgrounds. 

Michael Ixer ● 14d

Well he's certainly mysterious because not many people have heard of him!

Sue Hammond ● 14d

But it’s the heading, who is this person that has something important to say.  Why should I or anyone else take notice of this person that we’ve never heard of?  Surely when you write this heading, you would expect people to be curious and look him up?  Who is he to look down on the Daily Mail readers?
He is deliberately trying to give himself an air of mystery.  And I just wanted more info, especially with his supposed Birmingham, or is it Solihull, roots.

Martine Guy ● 14d

Martine, I don't really get why Paul Millicheap / Brian Bilston has sent you into a bit of a tailspin. He doesn't reveal many personal details and is not extremely well known, but so what? Why not have a look at his writing and make up your own mind about him....in fact, you could read the Daily Mail AND enjoy reading Brian Bilston; a balanced diet some might say!

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

I've just googled him, he came up straight away, writes loads of books.

Barbara Stevens ● 14d

No Martine, I've never heard of him.

Barbara Stevens ● 14d

Barbara, have you heard of Brian Bilston?

Martine Guy ● 14d

Well I buy the Daily Mail the other half likes the crossword. Also why pay so much to read the others, Anyway every subject is on the TV anyway apart from Shares.

Barbara Stevens ● 14d

Isn't it strange how many posters on here 'hate' the Mail but can't resist reading it?  It has a massive readership that the Guardian can only dream of lol.

Sue Hammond ● 14d

Hopefully  Martine, we will never have to hear him mentioned again.

Steven Rose ● 14d

A sublime piece of writing.I don't think I have ever come across a piece that gives two opposing points depending on which direction you read it.A palindrome reads the same backwards and forwards; does anyone know if this structure has a name?

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

Thanks Sue.  Never heard anyone mention him before.  

Martine Guy ● 14d

No you're not Martine, I've never heard of him either.  By either name.

Sue Hammond ● 14d

Gerry Boyce started a thread “Brian Bilston had something important to say”.  Well I’ve never heard of him before.  Am I the only one?

Martine Guy ● 14d

I couldn't care less where Brian Bilston was born, it's utterly irrelevant. Here's the text of the poem that Philippa mentioned.Refugees by Brian BilstonThey have no need of our help So do not tell me These haggard faces could belong to you or I Should life have dealt a different hand We need to see them for who they really are Chancers and scroungers Layabouts and loungersWith bombs up their sleeves Cut-throats and thieves They are not Welcome here We should make them Go back to where they came fromThey cannotShare our food Share our homes Share our countriesInstead let us Build a wall to keep them outIt is not okay to say These are people just like us A place should only belong to those who are born thereDo not be so stupid to think that The world can be looked at another way 

(Now read from bottom to top)

Richard Carter ● 14d

Michael, I looked up Brian Bilston because I had never heard of him.  When I saw the name Bilston I thought of the Black Country, as I am from the West Midlands.  Evidently he is a bit of a man of mystery, a bit like Banksy.  A few famous people come from my part of Birmingham, but he’s not one of them.  Anyway he’s quite difficult to find information on.  He sounds to me like a typical left wing academic sneering at the Mail and its readers.

Martine Guy ● 14d

Yes, I fail to see the connection too; unless of course he comes from Pratt's Bottom or Twatt, Bell End, Bitchfield or somewhere like that, in which case it might add a bit relevant context.He's not from Cockermouth by any chance?

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

I'm confused, what does where someone was born have to do with the quality (or not) of a poem?

Michael Brigo ● 14d

I tried again using his real name and it says he was born in leafy Solihull, which isn’t part of Birmingham, however his family do seem to have lived in various places in the West Mids. some of which aren’t that well off.

Martine Guy ● 14d

Because Paul Millicheap, aka Brian Bilston, is from Birmingham, I tried searching on Google to find out where he grew up, but it doesn’t say.  Anyone know?

Martine Guy ● 14d

Each to their own Martine, read what you like! It's not a case of The Guardian or The Daily Mail or The Sun etc, but you know, you are what you eat.....try and stick to a balanced diet!

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

Brian Bilston actually has the real name Paul Millicheap.  I guess he took the name Bilston because it makes him sound more like one of the workers, as Bilston is a place near Wolverhampton.  He doesn’t live in the West Midlands but he lives in Oxford.  There are probably quite a few Guardian readers in Oxford who sneer at the Mail.

Martine Guy ● 14d

Without fail, I read the Daily Mail.  Everyday that’s my way.
Hey, I’m a poet and I don’t know it.
I had to look up Brian Bilston and, I am sorry to say, he is from Birmingham.  I am sure there are are far more Daily Mail readers in the West Midlands than the Guardian readers. I make no apologies for reading MailOnline everyday for the gossip.  I do buy The Times everyday too.

Martine Guy ● 14d

Wow! Thanks Philippa, the poem Refugees is an incredible piece of work. Great to know there are keepers of the light; full of heart and humanity and an ability to weave words into wonderful poems.G'wan guys, read Refugees and give yer auld bun fights a break!

Gerry Boyce ● 14d

Ha ha.  He is good.  His poem "Refugees" - which you MUST read right to the end is one of my favourites.

Philippa Bond ● 14d