Forum Topic

School Girls

I'm afraid a long time from when I was at school, but I'm sure a lot on here have children of school age, with the News now saying about girls are suffering because boys are getting a bit over the mark. Would it not be better if boys were in boys schools and girls in girls. I was in an all girl's school and if you were even seen talking to boys in the lunch break the Headmistress wanted to know who you and your mate's were talking to. I know this seems a bit over the top, but this might be the only answer. As some boys who may have been brought up in other countries, might not have the same respect and perhaps should be taught it.

Barbara Stevens ● 1829d13 Comments

Yes Andy, also perhaps parents were not around much, the children had Au pair's.

Barbara Stevens ● 1829d

Yes Andy, I don't think Freddie understood what you meant. My mum would say it to me, in other words, tell the boys to keep their hands to themselves and don't let them go below the waist. If the girls did anything to the boys they should think themselves lucky. Ha Ha.

Barbara Stevens ● 1829d

Barbara whilst I agree that parents do have a role it's not necessarily kids from bad homes. The boys at Kings are among some of the most privileged ( financially) but could be amongst the poorest with regard to parental guidance.This is not about a particular sector of society.

Andy Pike ● 1829d

No im not Freddie not at all. I think girls are under a lot of pressure from boys and in some cases friends to conform and that they are sometimes convinced that its normal and expected etc etc. What I would hope is that their parents , older siblings etc would give them the strength and wisdom to say no and to respect themselves and their bodies.

Andy Pike ● 1829d

Freddie, let's hope now this has been highlighted that things might change. If children even new they could be helped, or bad one's new somebody was watching them very closely. But the problem is you don't know what some of their home life is like.

Barbara Stevens ● 1829d

@Andy“ Finally, there are also young women (girls ) who should have more respect for themselves. As my mum used to say to my sister 'keep your hand on your happeny'”Are you honestly displaying that seriously questionable old belief that girls bring out the worst in men by wearing certain types of clothing? E.g. man says she was asking for it because she was wearing a short skirt etc? If it is you’ve plainly not listened to a single word that’s been said recently about men’s attitude to women. Apologies if I’ve misunderstood. Please put me right.

Freddie Francis ● 1829d

Well, take it from me, Dulwich boys, amongst a number of other independent schools in London, not all, have had a reputation for arrogance and a nasty attitude, obviously also directed at girls significantly it now appears. I know this through having children who were in the independent system and through contemporaries from those other schools. Dulwich boys were not popular when it came to parties and events outside school. I doubt this is an issue with state schools as this behaviour is tied heavily to ‘entitlement’. This is not a case of blaming boys. It’s completely related to a few particular types of schools which may well be spread around the country but of which there is. cluster in south west and south London. It may well be something the parents need to address but the culture of this behaviour is very much a pupil problem, exacerbated by lack of action by the schools, which through the bad publicity may now be taken seriously. This is very much a modern situation, quite possibly, as someone suggested, not helped by access to pornography and the internet in general.

Freddie Francis ● 1829d

Ha, Ha, Andy, I remember being told that as well. I'm also not just blaming boys, I'm sure some girls are a handful. But perhaps keeping the girls and boys apart a bit more might help. Also older girls need to look out for being drugged and make sure they don't leave their drink.

Barbara Stevens ● 1829d

I'm not sure it's about co ed or single sex school. I was at an all boys grammar school and quite frankly was more interested in a game of football than trying to get over the fence to the next door girls school.The availability of pornography on line ( not behind a firewall) is largely to blame and the graphic nature of what is available. I remember sitting down with my son and explaining that this was not normal, not consensual and not respectful. Perhaps it's more down to parents taking responsibility and having hard conversations with their boys  rather than leaving it to schools. Finally, there are also young women (girls ) who should have more respect for themselves. As my mum used to say to my sister 'keep your hand on your happeny'

Andy Pike ● 1829d

I think you have a point Barbara. There was an article in The Telegraph quoting parents of boys who get "cancelled" with no due process following what could be a baseless accusation. It wouldn't surprise me if parents of boys look more towards a single sex school than they may have done previously to avoid any day to day aggrevation which may be the direction of travel. A school in Oz made boys stand up in assembly and apologise on behalf of menfolk everywhere which was the outrageous and must be giving these boys such a distorted view of the world.

John Geoffries ● 1829d

I wasn't at a posh school, I was Sheen Hertford Avenue, which I can assure you was not posh. But perhaps better than East London etc. But the Boys Grammer was the other side of our playground. All we could do was shout to the boys in our Lunch break. But these days how do we know if the girl wants to be  girl or a boy. Or boys girls. The point I'm trying to make is if they don't spend so much time together or even passing them in the corridors it might make a bit of difference. Or let girls out of school before the boys so they can get home.

Barbara Stevens ● 1829d

I'm sorry to burst that theory but least two of the schools, if not three, that are in the news ARE boys schools. That would seem to be at the root of the problem. There are some girls that have contact with the school as in JAGS girls (6th formers, I believe) who attend some classes at at Dulwich but that's a long, long way from co-ed. Fully co-ed may well be the solution in terms of destroying what has become a toxic adolescent, posh school, male culture in recent times.

Freddie Francis ● 1829d

That is a very valid comment Barbara, re: different countries and the way boys are brought up as opposed to girls.

Karen Taylor ● 1829d